On being a role model.

I've been making YouTube videos for over 3 years now, and before putting my face on the internet, I didn't feel like a role model, at least for anyone besides my sister and her friends. I was the awkward kid in high school. I was the newspaper geek in college, and most of the other people in the student organizations hated me because I knew what I was doing as a student journalist. I had friends, sure, but I always felt like I was the one looking up to them, not the other way around.

This week being deemed Body Confidence Week 2014 is a great thing. I've been participating in this Instagram challenge every day this week, as a way of showing people how to come to terms with their body and loving it for what it is. I don't have a perfect body. If you follow this blog, you know that. I look decent in clothes, but I've figured out how to look that way in clothes to make myself feel the most comfortable. 

Recently I've gotten a lot of comments from girls telling me that they look up to me, for one reason or another. Last week I posted my own version of a feminist rant about gender stereotypes in music and yadda yadda. I'll embed the video at the bottom of this post. But that video garnered some of the most emotional responses I've had in a long time. I'm really passionate about music and when people connect with that passion it makes me really happy. 

I know people put me in this hole of "beauty guru" sometimes because I make some beauty-related videos, which I'm not necessarily opposed to because it does bring in a lot of younger subscribers. But with that fanbase that I've built of largely 13-17 year old girls, I have found myself suddenly as a role model for these girls. That's something I've never been before, but I like it. Nothing makes me happier than when someone connects with my videos on a personal level, because those are my favorite kind of videos to make and watch. There's only so much discussion that can happen on a makeup collection or "what's in my purse" video. Hence, why I won't make those videos.

There are also those comments that I get that both make me sad as well as extremely happy. They make me sad to see that there are so many young people struggling with depression and self harm (it's a staggering amount of people, I can tell you that), but it makes me happy that I've somehow done something to help them without even knowing. I make videos about music because I love music, and when someone can find a band that they love from one of my suggestions, literally nothing makes me happier. And if one of those bands or songs help them through a rough time and stop them from doing something drastic, that hits me really hard.

Honestly it's comments like these that make me want to cry tears of joy. I have this opportunity to do something good with the platform I've been so generously been given by you all, and I will never try to squander that. You guys make me happy every day and I'm so fortunate that I get to do the same for you.

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  1. I found your video so inspirational that I started my On my way! fashion blog which I have been wanting to do for a while now.

    So thank you


  2. Just wanted to let you know that not only teenage girls watch you ;) I'm almost 25 and just LOVELOVELOVE that among all the girls on YouTube I found a few that I feel I can actually connect with. Girls who like and know about music, who are confident enough to declare their simultane love for an obscure band that still plays for free in a local theatre and Beyonce. Who is opinionated and can arugemnt things. Wear shiny green pants like it's nobody's bussines. Talk about make up without thinking it somehow makes you dumber and "more of a girl" (like it's a bad thing...). Understand my fullblown passion for Arctic Monkeys as a band aaand Alex Turner as an extremely hot member of the band :D

    Keep on with the amazing work you do ;)

    1. And excuse all the spelling chaos :D Forgot to spellcheck this time :D

  3. Thank you so much for sharing your fantastic message, Abby! Love the promotion of self-love and expression through style. It's definitely a way to feel more confident and outwardly show your inner self.
    Your videos are fantastic and really let YOU shine through. Could you please tell me what kind of camera you use to shoot video? It looks so great and nothing distracting (noise, fuzz, ambient noise, etc.)
    [camera choice seems like less than half the battle. Your confidence and personality really come through. So inspiring]

    Thanks again for sharing your wisdom and thoughts! :)